EUGENE, Ore. -- The pain of Chris Kilcullen's death is never far for his father, John Kilcullen.
"It's been one of the worst years I've ever had in my life," he said. "We all think about him everyday and there are some moments that are more intense than others. But already today, I've already had ten or 15 moments where there's just a wave of emotion that comes over me to stop and think."
Kilcullen said the family reminds Chris' daughter of her father often.
"The words that we always encourage her to use, and the one that she always comes up with, is hero," he said.
But Kilcullen said the time he spends with his granddaughter is often bittersweet.
"She'll be just carrying on...and it makes me sad when I think about what he's missing," he said.
A year after Kilcullen's death, the flowers and flags are gone from the spot where he was shot, but there's a lasting legacy in the community. According to Eugene Police, perhaps there has been a shift in attitude as well.
"There certainly has been a change, probably, in how our officers feel on the street, how they approach subjects, and we're more focused and more determined," said Eugene Chief of Police Pete Kerns.
"Anytime an organization or group goes through something substantial -- and in this case, it was traumatic -- they tend to either grow closer or grow further apart. And our experience is that we've grown much closer together," said Kerns.
Kerns said officers have gone through more safety training since Kilcullen's death, in particular, relating to car stops.
The suspect in Kilcullen's murder, Cheryl Kidd, is still at the Oregon State Hospital in Salem. Kidd faces murder charges for the shooting, but was sent to the state hospital in June. Kidd's attorney told KVAL News she undergoes periodic evaluations, but little has changed. If Kidd is not found fit to stand trial after three years, criminal charges will be dismissed and it will become a civil case.
"I think it's a natural frustration that when anyone is murdered, the suspect isn't in the traditional way held to account," said Kerns. "The most important thing to us is that they don't represent danger to police officers or anyone else in the future."
Kilcullen said he hopes his son, and his legacy, are not forgotten.
"What we want is for people to continue to remember him and remember what he stood for and to appreciate what he and all the other officers in this area and statewide, nationwide, actually, do everyday the risks that they expose themselves to," said Kilcullen.