Stopping child abuse: 'It's not about whether we can, it's whether we will'
»Play Video
EUGENE, Ore. - Cutting child abuse and neglect in Lane County by 90 percent by the year 2030: Is that preposterous - or possible?
"I think yes, the answer is anything is possible," said Kelly Sutherland with the Relief Nursery.
The idea for the "90 by 30" project came 2 years ago not because existing programs don't work but because University of Oregon educators think they can work better. The project is paid for from private funds and grants. The program will be holding its first annual conference Friday and Saturday at Eugene's Valley River Inn.
"It's more the idea of taking the responsibility for that intervention away from that handful of people in government or non-profits and putting it where it belongs with each of us," said program director Phyllis Barkhurst.
So how will it work?
Barkhurst said Lane County will be divided into six zones, with local councils getting information to people on the warning signs of abuse.
"Where you know your neighbor and know that you can trust your neighbor and you can reach out to your neighbor for support; even in those neighborhoods, rates of abuse and neglect are much lower," said Dr. jeff Todahl, program co-director.
The challenge is daunting. In 2011, nearly 75,000 founded cases of child abuse or neglect were recorded in Oregon, 710 of those in Lane County.
Going hand in hand with the abuse cases are the cases of neglect, something the Relief Nursery in Eugene has to deal with every day.
"Neglect does not have to be an intentional act," Sutherland said. "It's a product of the environment and their circumstances and so we need to collectively address those issues."
Inform and mobilize: dual goals of the "90 by 30" project so that maybe horrible abuse deaths like
in 2009 can be prevented.
"It's not about whether we can," Todahl said. "It's much more a matter of whether we will."
Want to get more involved? Take a stand and march with us in the first ever national Million March Against Child Abuse on April 22, 2013! Marches are being held all across the nation as well as in Washington, D.C. Join a march near you today! https://www.facebook.com/MMACAmarches
I disagree with the headline. You will never stop it. Just like alcoholism and drug use. All you can do is react to it.
I applaud these people and their efforts.
I do however think it's going to be very hard if at all possible to stop emotional, mental and physiological abuse. By the time these children are able to articulate what's happening to them it will already be too late! If they ever say anything at all.
I know because I went through it.
When you are a very young child and are being emotionally, mentally and physiologically abused, you don't realize what's going on or that it's wrong, (you think this is the way things are) you only know its very painful! Because emotional, mental, and physiological doesn't show any outward signs of abuse like physical abuse or sexual abuse. Although children suffering from emotional abuse become problem children, at least that is what people call them. I don't think a lot of people realize that most of a child's negative behavior is brought on by emotional abuse or not getting the nurturing and love they need. And again nothing is set in stone, but for the most part a child who is loved and nurtured "usually" doesn't have negative behavior issues! Where as the opposite is also usually true.
So even if you suspect a child is being emotionally (or even know if for sure) abused getting into the child's home or stopping it is almost impossible. Without direct knowledge or actually witnessing the abuse, its pretty hard to prove emotional abuse in court! Emotional abuse is a learned thing, the parent was abused, so when they grow up they abuse their children.
Its not something they (parents, guardians, foster people) think about, this is who they are and what they've learned as children. A child's brain is a recorder, they record everything they hear and see, weather its good or bad and nothing is going to erase it, it's there forever. Its very hard to break that cycle. Again nothing is set in stone, some people are able to raise above this, but for most of us we are what we've learned and its very hard (and mostly impossible) to swim against the current.
And the fact that we have so much child abuse in our nation tells me that a whole lot of people aren't able to make that change...
I decided at the age of about 17, I would never have children (and didn't) because I knew what was done to me, I would have done to my children and I wasn't going to hurt a child like I was hurt. I broke that cycle, but I paid a very high price, because I love children I would have loved to have had a daughter...
Clint Eastwood said it best in one of his movies. "A man's got to know his limitations!"
God protect us from ourselves...